Can people really be trusted? And anyway is there any reason why i should trust people?…
Am sure we are all reading this for different reasons: for some it could be you are actually here out of curiosity, for others because they don’t trust people and feel a bit connection to the topic, others have people they trust and they are concerned on why someone would have trust issues and then interestingly others are the closest persons to my heart and they are feeling cheated by this title and wondering so how much does she really trust me? Anyway for whatever reason you are reading this, we can all agree that trust is a word we don’t know how to explain it in our society.
The setting of today’s society, has taught us to not to trust anyone. If you stay in Nairobi you know what i mean, in this town you must always walk like everyone is a thief except yourself, even a stranger who extends a hand of greeting, run for your life! In banks the pens are normally tied to a string, because even the bankers don’t trust us with a pen costing just 30/= yet you are banking 10,000/=. We get emails everyday that try to steal money from us through scams. Thieves look for our personal information so that they can rob us. Some of the present religious people come to us in the name of the Lord but we find ourselves in damaging cults. As if money is not enough to steal if you are single cunning charmers will try to steal our hearts and then walk out at will and leave you broken. Friends and family turn their backs on us and spread every bit of our secrets and weaknesses. Then of cos we are “I have trust issues” generation.
It is unfortunate that even in the place where we are in church or in para-church organisations, when serving among our fellow brethren in ministries we still hold hands together and say, i still don’t trust so-and-so. When our church leaders don’t don’t live up to our expectations we are crushed too and may lose our trust on them, we have brethren who simply decide its just time i moved to another church.
The reality is that when we don’t trust, we may be:
- Acting on our own insecurities and misperceptions
- Living in suspicion and constant anxiety
- Expecting that other people are going to hurt us or let us down.
- Worrying that someone in a relationship with us is going to reject us and leave us to face the world alone
- Fear that people will discover and blab our secrets, causing us deep humiliation and shame
- Living in fear that we won’t be able to emotionally handle the betrayal of our trust
King David said, “It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man. It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in princes” (Psalm 118:8–9). David spoke from experience, having been betrayed many times by those close to him (Psalm 41:9). Instead of becoming bitter or regarding all people as inherently untrustworthy and not worth his time, he learned and taught a simple truth: sinful people will fail us, but we can always trust in God. First of all, we should not be surprised. Human beings are weak, they will break our hearts, they will forget their promises and move on as if they never committed to anything, the person you loved may just get another person and come up with all kinds of stories explaining how you were not even aligned to his purpose in life and he moves on with another girl and life for him sounds normal,the girl you loved most might decide to change cards and just ask you to understand and friends may spill our secrets. We can’t control what they do. We can, however, control how we react to to their hurtful actions! Even though others will fail us at times, and we ourselves are not always trustworthy, we can and should still trust people. Without trust, true relationship is impossible. If we therefore completely water away the desire to ever trust people again in our lives, we simply invite superficial relationships in our lives. It is precisely because we know that God will never fail us that we can trust others. Our ultimate security is in Him, so we are free to trust others and experience the joy it brings. Sometimes it is difficult to tell the difference between being wise about our trust and being overly self-protective out of past hurt or fear. If we find ourselves reluctant to trust anyone to any extent, we are wise to do some introspection and, if necessary, ask God to heal our wounded hearts, there is no better feeling than having a healed heart that finds no desire in pricking out what happened in the past to affect the future. And God is a true healer!
The most convincing argument for trusting other people comes not from whether or not a person is trustworthy, but from the consequences of trusting no one. Even if we have been deeply hurt by another human being , we are not to give up on our trusting of other people. When suspicion, mistrust, withdrawal, isolation, and cynicism seem like the trustworthy option, we will find that sin is at our doorstep!
We know that our Enemy is always at work to divide and isolate Christians from Jesus and from one another. He will make sure bitterness remains unconfessed so that reconciliation seems impossible and self-justification can reign instead. He will work hard to use mistrust to keep believers divided and isolated from one another so that they think that they, themselves, are the only safe place they have left. When the devil succeeds in isolating you, he takes you to a place of hopelessness, his kind of paradise.
Trust begins with God. He keeps his promises to us if we ask Him. When we learn to trust God, the door opens for us to trust others.We can then enjoy the benefits of relationships without resentment and emotional pain.
I refuse to allow the devil to isolate me, no matter how many times trust has been broken, i will look at people through redemption angle and ask God to make me whole again.
As long as i trust, He is so faithful to guide me. So help me God.