I have contemplated writing this letter for the longest time now and here is a piece of love for every gal out here: Jesus Loves you.

I will start by talking about this woman- Proverb 31 Woman:I have been in the Christian circles long enough and have heard, read, preached on and advised on this passage countless times, I have told myself ‘Sarah be the Proverb 31 woman’, I have could have perhaps called myself one and even people have often done that. All ladies in the christian network can relate with me, we have received this pressure from within and without to become this woman. Some of us have developed a poised humility of talking, walking and serving men just so that we are referred to as the proverb 31 woman who is the right woman to marry. Some of us have developed another kind of humility so that we are careful not to talk in front of people lest we become less of what the christian circle believes this woman should be, we even adopt a ‘humble’ way of walking, dressing and conducting ourselves before people. The expectations are too much! This mysterious woman who is the epitome of grace-filled godly womanhood has become the benchmark of the godliest of christian women and she is practically perfect in every way!

Then after all the pressure to be her, you notice you are just not like her! One because fellow us(and may the lord forgive us) have added some other traits to her: you must be a ‘silent’ gal, hardworking, succeeding in all her work, not jumping from one relationship to the other, you must be a virgin, you must be this and that… Then after evaluating yourself you seemingly have failed in every way; You literally cannot sew fine linen like her or you probably drop in bed like a sack of potatoes and end up waking up late most of the mornings, you have not yet mastered how many alarms you need in the morning to get you out of bed and then according to the parameters of this woman, she was never late to wake up! Perhaps you are that kind of girl, you have made mistakes in life, loved the wrong people and heartbroken more times than you can ever count, virginity is now a dream that cannot fit into the current reality, perhaps disobeyed your parents, even committed the worst of sin and you feel the proverb 31 woman is just a tall order!

This letter is just for you dear sweet gal with so much Love;

Dearest, you are not alone, most of us have judged ourselves too harshly by the standards of Proverb 31- and sadly we have disqualified ourselves because of all our flaws-some only us know about, we have felt judged and disqualified to ever become good wives perhaps or even servants in the house of the Lord, we have felt we do not deserve to serve in the altar anymore, we are too imperfect for it. Some of us have struggled and pretended enough just so we are attain this kind of perfection and even so we find that we still feel we are not there yet.

But I’m so thankful you’re thinking about sin. I’m so thankful you’re thinking about what it means to be a sinner, what it means to realize that so often you do the bad stuff you swore you wouldn’t do. And not only that, but so often you don’t do the good stuff you had promised to do. I know sin is a hard thing to think about, you might be comparing yourself to your brother and sister and asking, “Why am I so much more sinful than they are?” “Why just have I failed!” In the process of comparing yourself with the rest you have forgotten that we are all sinners who seriously need God’s Grace, some of us who serve on the altar keep sinning differently yet sadly we still judge you! You see dear, the problem is that we carry in us very sinful hearts that need redemption.

Is there a likelihood to be a proverb 31 woman for you really? What then will you do with your imperfection?The Proverb 31 woman I have realized is fictional- she seems to have all together, she is perfect because she just is not real! this passage to me presents principles not a person: and it presents principles that can be achieved at any stage in life by any person, I will mention just two key areas i learn from her:

  1. Her heart is sold out to Jesus- The poem opens with the idea that a wise woman one who fears the Lord, and she is worth the search! For when found, she will be of the highest personal character and fiscally responsible. This woman first is sold out to Christ fully and from that flows all the other issues that are talked about her. She knows that God makes things new, He gives all wisdom needed in life and orders our steps as we live with His people. We all can make a new start or better our walk with the Lord. On a daily basis, the Lord offers us an opportunity to establish a new relationship/better our walk with Him no matter what we have done, you can come with all the imperfections and lay them down at His feet, you can bring all the bitterness and shame that choices you have made have brought to Him.It was a long time before I realized (and, believe me, I am still in the process of realizing) that God’s love for me was more than enough, even when it feels like my walk with Him is in a downward spiral.That kind of love that Jesus offers cannot be earned. It can only be given, and it is the sweetest gift that you could ever possibly receive. This doesn’t mean that I can simply throw caution to the wind and sin at will because my eternity is set in stone. Rather, it means that when I struggle, when I stray, I have Christ calling me back and loving me all the way. Our straying from God’s path for our life does not affect His love for us, it tells us that “I can remake you again!” “I can mold you back, just trust me.” All people therefore, as imperfect as they are, are made beautiful again by Him.

So dear instead of reading Proverbs 31 as an impossible standard, we should focus instead on coming back to God and serving Him wholeheartedly.2. Responsibility- This is a principle I see in her, in that she practices responsibility. She is responsible of her income, family and takes care of her household. Dedication and service is all she displays. We do not have a glimpse of her past life to know how she practiced it before, after all the present is what she is now not her past. We can take up responsibility and dedication to life in the present. responsibility of our work, academics, parents and siblings, friendships, finances and every matter about life. You can desire to start fully graced by the Lord to be diligent in every matter that concerns your life, it is not an unattainable target since we do not walk alone- not by might, nor by power but by the spirit of the Lord! May the Lord help us.

The proverb 31-woman therefore is not a list of “shoulds” for women, or men for that matter. It’s a set of traits that should be admired and emulated, and only are achievable in Christ Jesus. Proverbs 31:10-31 is like a testimony of how God is shaping us into His image- we can therefore present our imperfect selves unashamedly in the Potter’s hands.

With a lot of Love,


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